Darren's Thoughts on the Home Theater

This is a direct quote from Darren, "After visiting 27 stores that sell home theater systems, talking to 16 salesman and 19 installers, and changing my mind 7 times (you know, the cone-shaped sound those in-ceiling speakers would have made would have been such a disappointment and a total rip-off; whoever gave me that advice had a screw loose) I have finally decided on the system I'm going to purchase. There will be 6 speakers in the room, three in front (two on each side of the screen and one beneath), two in the back, and one free-standing one. When you're in the room, the sound will come at you from every direction and envelop you in joy and perfection. Whoever is lucky enough to be invited into this room will never forget their life changing experience."

He also said: "You will probably never see me again once this room is finished. This theater will be the culmination of all my life goals and I plan to eat, sleep, and drink in this room. I have even asked my boss if I can work from home, because I suspect my productivity will increase 500% with all the great people in sports right before me with the touch of a button. You will only be able to visit with me if you are in the room too, and then only reverently and during commercials. We may want to invest in a port-a-potty because the nearest bathroom is 11 steps away, a fact we should have considered more seriously before we purchased this house, but we'll have to make the best out of what we have."

Oh yeah, and he said this too, "While eating lunch for the fifth day this week at Costco, I saw to my delight that they just got in leather chairs for theater rooms; they're so incredible because they recline AUTOMATICALLY with just the touch of a button. I really sense that sitting in one of these chairs will heal my aching back and cure my painful hip, and, wow, now that I contemplate it, if everyone in the world could have and sit in one of these chairs, world peace would be achieved and true brotherhood would be accomplished."

Also, "By the way, the screen's going to be huge."

And finally, "I want that home theater to be done so bad right now."

These comments are true and accurate to the best of my ability, and if anything, a little toned down because I cannot replicate the tone of pure emotion in which they were stated.

This is rubbing off on the kids, because when we went to see the movie the Water Horse recently, Maddie asked me if our screen was going to be that big, or not quite that big.

(Not quite that big is the correct answer.)